The Islanders

We had accommodation booked for our return to Bangkok and for the boys (Barry & Arthur) as they would arrive the next day. The first thing we noticed about being back in Kho San Road area that it was noticeably quieter and there were more police on the streets. We had been following it in the news and it seemed like one minute an agreement had been made, the next it was all going off again, although the worst finale was still a few weeks away yet! And it had obviously affected tourism what with the bar on all travel to the country – although I still to this day think it was a completely overhyped media sensation and no where near as awful as it was. (Not belittling the deaths and destruction that happened!! Just that it wasn’t ALL over Bangkok and Thailand. It’s like the action happening in Wimbledon and you want to visit Chingford and all travel to London and then the UK is banned! Or for you Dutchies, action in Amsterdam, you want to be in Rotterdam, all travel to Holland banned!) A little over the top I feel.

Anyway – the following day bright and early Tymon went off the airport to meet the boys. They arrived at the hostel safe and sound and it was really great to see them after all this time. Especially for Tymon as his mates are such a big part of his life and he’s really missed that. Which is why I let him go to the airport alone, so they could get all their male bonding and silly sayings like ‘Gerard, kenkerzooi, dat meen je niet, Duitser!!’ out of the way! These don’t really mean anything and are not said like normal words, it’s more like a string of funny sounds they come out with – boys!! I can only compare it to the kind of thing girls do when some exciting news is announced, a baby is around or an engagement ring is shown :0)

Even though they had had a really long flight and had hardly slept, they freshened up and we went straight out for a walk around town. It was déjà vu for us but it was good to be able to kind of show the boys around Kho San road. We decided to go a bit further out on the road to see where we would end up and at the main road a very nice friendly guy asked us how we were and where we were going. We said we were going to walk around and he started giving us some tips. He said that it was a holiday day so we should flag down a government tuk tuk as it would only be 10 Baht and all the temples would be free. He started telling us all these things and for the first time on our trip, what with the boys taking it all in, when 2 tuk tuks conveniently pulled up shortly after, while the guy was still talking to us, we climbed in. He told the drivers where we wanted to go after he had convinced us we wanted to go there and they took us to the temple we wanted to go which was fine. Then as we got back in to go to the next he said ‘oh we just stop at a clothes store for you to look in and then a jewellery store!’ We got scammed. Basically the nice guy would have known the drivers and got some money in the end and the driver gets commission for when he takes people to these shops and even more if they buy something so we ended up being carted around town, ‘shopping’. Even the guy in one of the temples was expecting us! Tymon was pretty annoyed as he prides himself on picking out a scam when he sees one! It was as if the boys had ‘new arrivals’ stamped on their foreheads! Can’t believe we got scammed! But all in all, it wasn’t so bad. I mean we were under no obligation to buy anything and it didn’t cost us anything. Tymon even said that if he went to one more place then we wouldn’t even pay him the 10 baht as he’d earned a fortune from carting us around to the shops so in the end it cost us nothing, and we got to see some of the sights.

What with being up so early (something we’re not used to) when we got back we all took a nap for a while before heading out for dinner. While we were out Tymon and Barry ended up going into a tailors and getting a suit made each so there was a lot of backward and forward there for fittings but the suits were looking pretty swish!!

We’d decided to leave the following day as we all wanted to get down to the islands as soon as possible and away from the unbearable heat of Bangkok. Luckily there was a night bus as it was going to be a mammoth journey. Ideally we would have gone to Koh Tao first, then to Koh Phangnan, onto Koh Samui and then cross overland to Koh Phi Phi, but the boys really wanted to go to a moon party on Koh Phangnan so our whole trip had to be tailored around the dates of the party. We weren’t going to be around for the full moon but if we travelled in a completely illogical way we could be there for half moon. So we were going to Koh Phi Phi first, which was the furthest away hence the mammoth journey! It involved several mini busses, a boat, one big bus, a boat and another mini bus! But 18 hours later and severely sleep deprived we finally arrived in Koh Phi Phi.

It was pretty hectic when we got off the boat. We had called ahead to one hostel to make a reservation and they said they would be at the jetty to meet us. There was someone there, along with loads of other touts pushing leaflets in our faces, and he told us to walk up to the main hotel office. We loaded our backpacks onto a trolley contraption that a local pushed and walked through the labyrinth small streets that made up central Phi Phi. It was scorching, so I was really happy that we didn’t have to carry our packs as it was quiet a walk. (Well not really but it always feels like miles away with your back pack!) The hostel was decent enough, clean room with bathroom, which believe me has become a luxury! It was mid afternoon so we immediately changed and headed to the beach and in all honestly I wasn’t that blown away. I guess I was expecting beautiful crystal blue water right up to the beach with a sand bottom, but the water was miles away! The tide was out (but even when it wasn’t it was still pretty far out to go before you reached anything above waist height!) It was really rocky and the whole stretch of beach within the ‘cove’ just wasn’t all that. I guess it was a bit like when we were in Indonesia – I had such high expectations that in reality it didn’t quite match. I mean don’t get me wrong, it was nice. It wasn’t a skank hole but for what you imagine from all the postcards of the islands…it was lacking. We tossed a Frisbee around for a while, grabbed some food before heading to the rooms to freshen up and have a nap before dinner. (We seemed to have fallen into a child like day with our afternoon naps – otherwise we got groggy! Haha) That night we walked around the main town area following the pathway that twisted and turned. There were lots of stalls selling jewellery and clothes and lots of bars. It was pretty busy and was quite a young crowd. And very British! You could hear all the shouting and yobbing going on, getting wrecked – ‘f*cking this and f*cking that mate! Havin’ it!!’ Girls wearing not very much (which pleased Barry and Art ;0) and god I sound old, but once again the whole atmosphere just wasn’t what I was expecting. I was still pretty knackered as was Tymon so we left the boys to go out and explore the girls!

As we were on quite a tight schedule to fit all four islands in, thankfully, we only had 2 days in Phi Phi before heading to Koh Tao. Our final day we took a boat trip out to ‘The Beach’ where they filmed the film, and I can’t argue, it is a lovely beach. The water is clear and sandy, although still not deep for a long way out, the sand clean and it’s set in a lovely cove surrounded by jungle. It even has a hanging penis!! Haha. There is a large rock formation hanging from one of the overhangs of a cliff that is unmistakingingly shaped like a willy. And of course the pictures of Barry hanging off it (like a sperm) was a great image the boys couldn’t pass up!

We also went round the corner of the island of ‘The Beach’ to the lagoon where they filmed the shark scene. This again is lovely, the water an amazing topaz blue with a lot of coral. We had a refreshing dip which was nice until something started taking nips out of us! At which point I promptly swam back to the boat!!

That night we went to the Reggae Bar which has a boxing ring in where you can train in the daytime with Muay Thai boxers and by night they have fights on. Or so they lead you to believe. When we first walked in it was the tourists turn to have a go in order to each receive a free bucket, so they put on the sweaty stinky shorts, leg stockings and helmet to fight an opponent, usually a friend. I mean in a very loose sense this is funny, especially when they aren’t friends and one person is better than the other and they actually get a bit of a knocking, and its even more entertaining of course when it’s girls, but overall it’s pretty pathetic. And unfortunately it doesn’t even get that exciting when the real Thai boxers come into the ring. At first I was really excited to see some real Muay Thai but as soon as the second punch/kick was thrown I knew instantly that it was a set up, choreographed to perfection. I mean they still hit each other and kick real hard, but it’s a lot less damaging when it’s expected. It was WWF Asian style. The saddest & almost funniest thing was the young boys who were whooping and gasping astonished when one guy went down, obviously believing in every second. Once again I had no desire to go out and get off my face in Phi Phi, plus it was ridiculously expensive, so we headed back to the room while Barry and Art continued their quest for girls.

Next island – Koh Tao. It was another massive mission as we had to cross the south of Thailand to the East coast and go back on ourselves up North, so it was another bus, boat, bus adventure and we arrived at the lovely hour of 6am. We got in the back of a truck which took us from the jetty to the central junction where we dumped all the bags and the boys went to look for accommodation. Now the thing with the islands is that they are full of lovely resorts and also budget accommodation and what with being on an island I just wanted to have a bit of luxury. I wanted to be able to eat the fresh seafood and stay in a place with aircon but it was so out of our budget, and the budget places were just beach huts that in reality were more like saunas than accommodation. I’m sure if people asked if they had a spa with a sauna they could pull it off and stick people in our room. But at that time of day the boys came back with somewhere to go which was better than nothing. We all crawled into bed for a couple of hours and woke up ready (albeit slightly roasted) to have a look around.

Our main criteria for Koh Tao was to do our Open Water diving course and become certified. We’d heard the diving was the best in the islands so we spent most of the day walking up the main strip getting all the deals from the dive shops. The further from the centre we went the cheaper they got, so it was worth holding out and going for a walk. We finally decided to go with Phoenix Divers, which were brilliant and had the best deal by far. We got our accommodation included, which was a resort with aircon (HURRAH) and breakfast included. We started that day by watching the intro films but sadly we had already paid for the night at the sauna so would have to sweat it out before moving.

We were all pretty excited and went out that night to celebrate. I left at 1am as we had to be in the classroom by 10am (hardly an early start) but I didn’t want to be all hung over. Tymon came home about 2.30am and of course the next morning we found out the boys had had about 1.5 hours sleep!! It was a new island therefore new girls!! ;0) Oh to be single again I guess.

Thankfully we packed up and left the sauna and moved into a beautiful massive room with aircon!! I blasted that baby on like there was no tomorrow. Thailand is just soooo hot in May! Then breakkie and off to the classroom. We spent the morning learning some theory and then after lunch we kitted up and went out for our first lesson in the water. I had already, many years ago in Egypt done my half Padi, which had already expired a long time ago, and Barry has also dived previously but for Tymon and Art it was a new experience. We didn’t go deep as we were just learning all the techniques and requisites for the certification and it was really fun. We were in the water nearly 2 hours but it flew by and as went through all the exercises I was happy it felt strangely familiar. The whole losing your mouthpiece and leaning over and finding it again with an arm sweep. The signals to your buddy that you are out of air, inflating and deflating and of course the dreaded filling up of your mask with water and emptying it again all under water. I hate that exercise and usually panic but I surprised myself and managed to do it with little stress. It’s a funny feeling as you have a mouthpiece in and you know you can breathe but you find yourself holding your breath in concentration. Then you forget to breathe, you have your eyes shut tightly so you don’t get salt water in them and they sting, so your senses are a bit off and then you still haven’t breathed so you start to panic because you can’t breathe and can’t see. You start to take big gulps from the tank which seems very alien and it’s like your brain doesn’t accept the air as it knows it’s underwater and you shouldn’t be able to breathe in. In some cases you find yourself floating to the surface cos you’ve inadvertently kicked your way to the top, breaking the surface time rule, so it can be a bit messy. (Well that was only me one time) but on the whole we all did well. Tymon felt a bit queasy but we think that was down to a hangover more than anything else.

Tymon and I were absolutely knackered by the end of the day so we just chilled (literally) in the room with our satellite TV and got takeaway pizza. Heaven!! Barry and Art – well you guessed it – went out to party ;0)

Next day was our first proper dives. After some more theory we went out to sea. It was all very exciting kitting up on the boat and going down the first time was really cool. It wasn’t that deep, only about 12 metres but the coral was nice and there were lots of fish. We also got to practice the exercises again in relatively shallow water in case anything goes wrong it’s not that far to the surface.

Scuba diving is in a word – awesome. If you have a good site and the visibility is good it’s out of the world. And it is. It’s a completely different world down there and it’s amazing to think that in reality we still know so very little about it. It’s not our domain it’s the fishes and coral and it’s so humbling. Nature is incredible; I mean the tropical fish are amazing. The colours and patterns are insane – so beautiful!!

Both dives went smoothly and we couldn’t wait for the morning to go again!

Our last day was two more dives at two more sites. It was an early start at 7am as early in the morning is when fish are more active. We also had a videographer come with us which was cool as we had been unable to really make any videos underwater as our camera is only made for up to 3 metres, so it was cool to have someone capturing footage. (Another video for you to watch when we’re back - & you will be watching it – it cost an arm & a leg!) Dive one went without a hitch but when we surfaced I could feel my right ear playing up. It had a little water in it so it sounded like everything was muffled but it cleared itself after a while which was great news!! However once under on the second dive (after making us all return to the boat as I lost my weight belt on the jump in and only realized when I couldn’t sink!) I had real trouble equalizing. We went down to about 18 metres on this dive but unfortunately I couldn’t really relax and enjoy it as I was constantly having to go up to re-equalize. It was really annoying and such a shame as it was our last dive!! But hey – when we got back to shore we were qualified divers!! Whooo hoo!! The world above and below sea level really is now our oyster! We spent the rest of the day relaxing and that night went out for a real party to celebrate. And we partied hard! It was brilliant. You will never guess what I spent the night dancing away to! Jungle! Oh my god, talk about flash back! All those Friday nights at the Palladium came rushing back to me. Trying to do the black girl move skipping from side to side (Helen and Lindz you’ll remember that classic move!) and listening to songs like “Badboy in a Kingston, rudeboy in a England (or whatever the words actually are…) and the best of all – I went crazy when it came on – “Eezer good eezer good, he’s Ebeneezer good!” Do you remember that??? How classic! “Got any salmon? Sorted!” Hahaha – the good old days. Tymon was amazed – he never even knew I liked Jungle and I just said – I grew up on it!! It was all the rage and I’ll have to rummage through the cupboards to see if I still have the ‘Now Jungle’ double cassette!!

We were supposed to leave the following day to Koh Phangnan but we took a vote and we had days to play with so decided to stay another 3 days. Barry and Art decided to do their advanced diving course and Tymon and I chilled on the beach. We also did a day quad biking around the island which was awesome! Tymon was nearly beside himself. He loves quadding and has been looking everywhere for somewhere to be able to do it and here it was. We all took one, including me and went for a tour around the island. Which is beautiful. We went to a couple of snorkel sites and off road, where Barry got his bike stuck! It was a really fun day!! Finished with a few drinks and a trip to the local Lady Boy cabaret show. This was hilarious – check out the video!!

And that was it for Koh Tao – we’d had a blast, but it was to move on – the Half Moon party called, so off to the next island, Koh Phangnan…..